Just got up because I couldn't sleep. I went looking for Pema Chödron's book on Fear, couldn't find any with a preview, so I watched a few videos about her teachings instead. Had an a-ha moment in this one; "Smile at Fear - A Reservoir of Trust".
A bit of a rude awakening in the sense that she says we are all looking for hope and a feeling of grounding (I know I am), which is causing us to hang on to life and be fearful. Hope and fear according to her are two sides of the same coin. Which is why trust and joy only comes from the the fact that the world will always respond to us, that's it. It might be good, it might be bad, it might be mediocre, it might be what we want, it might not be what we want, but it will respond. I suppose that is the ultimate trust and acceptance (I can safely say that I am not there yet).
She also says success and failure is the path of awakening, which is the fearless approach. When we have "undesirable feelings" we should be with that feeling fully, (in my case today - feel the fear), be with it, even when it is damn uncomfortable.
From this talk I got the quote for my painting.
I'm waiting for the tide to change, but will I create while I'm waiting.